The importance of safe play

May 8, 2010

I want to take a moment to step away from the light-hearted and fun posts I have published of late, to talk about a very serious topic that is crucial to all of us, male or female.  I was reading comments made by Indy and Kaelah regarding Indy’s first spanking, and the subject of meeting play partners though personal ads was brought up.  I want to deeply encourage, neigh, BEG any/everyone who utilizes these services to PLEASE take every single precaution you can think of… and then think of more… to guarantee yourselves a trip home with your body, mind, and emotions intact.  What I am about to divulge is deeply personal, and until  this point known only by a handful of people, but I feel it will help for others to learn from my mistakes that have already been made and cannot be withdrawn from my life and hopefully save them from being subjected to the fate I suffered.

In September of 2000, I was just beginning my foray into the wonderful World of adult consensual spanking play, and was currently in a cyber-relationship with a Couple that I referenced in my introductory posts.  I had not yet felt a genuine swat across my bottom other than my own under instruction of  my Tops, and the yearning was growing stronger by the day.  This yearning was combined with some very turbulent happenings at the time, such as my Grandfather, whom I was around very frequently since I was a baby, being very ill with end-stage cancer, and my lingering confusion over my recently found strong sexual desires for men.  These three things combined pushed me into a weakened and vulnerable emotional/mental state, and sent me down a road riddled with mistakes that could have ended fatally, and DID cause unwanted physical pain and emotional pain that is still with me to this day.

I was chatting with a man I had contacted on the Yahoo Personals site who caught my eye, and was describing the experience I would like to have with a man like him.  I had told him about my deep desire to be put over someones knee and soundly spanked, and also how I was unlocking the doors to M/m sexual contact.  I was very sure to repeatedly say that, if I became as aroused as I was thinking I would from the spanking, I would very happily please him orally… but was not comfortable going to the point of penetration due to my nervousness/virginity.  That was mistake number one… giving a possible predator a trophy to aquire.  He was very quick to agree to everything I said, and told me I would get my bottom well paddled as soon as I wanted it.  I was very happy to discover that we lived quite close, and the thoughts of driving a short distance home with a rosy, sore bottom to vigorously relieve my arousal overcame any thoughts of proper meeting procedures.  I dont think I have to even state that was mistake number two.  This chain led to mistake number three, which was eagerly agreeing to come to his house for my spanking immediately and therefore putting myself totally under his control, within his own territory.

I slipped on a pair of jeans that were quite snug enough to make my bottom extremely enticing, took the ping pong paddle I had bought just for such purposes out of my closet, and drove to meet my fate like a lamb to slaughter.  Once I arrived, I was welcomed in with a handshake, and a firm squeeze to my bottom.  Given the amount of eagerness shown in that gesture, as well as the very obvious show of arousal within the pants of my host, I should have been turning on every single red light in my brain…. but I ran every single one of those lights due to inexperience/naivete as well as my very tainted mental and emotional status.  There is a classic example of  mistake number four… allowing an unsound mind to put your sound body and possibly your life at risk.  After breaking the ice briefly, I presented my paddle to him, and asked him to give me the spanking I knew I needed.  He took the paddle, set it on the coffee table, and relieved me of my jeans and underwear before placing me over his lap.  I was then given a few mild swats with the paddle that were barely more than a tickle, and then felt his hand  come down on me.  He then started to mix mild swats with squeezes and rubs, which quickly became just squeezes, and progressed to fondling of other parts of my body in close proximity to my cheeks.  I distinctly felt his erection grow stiffer and longer, and that was my first signal of a possibly bad situation.  My thoughts were taken other places however, when he picked me up off of his lap and placed me on my knees, with my chest draped over the back of the sofa.  This position left my bottom very very available in every way, and all I could think of was “oh boy, Im going to really get it good now”, and let my mind fill with those happy thoughts.  I completely let my guard down, which was mistake number six, the worst and final mistake I made that day.  I am sure I do not have to tell you what happened next, but I will say I was in a floating daze as my hips were being repeatedly pushed into the back of the sofa, and my virginity being ripped from me in a manner more vile than I can even describe.  This daze lasted through the full conclusion, and also me dressing as if the experience I had just gone through was something I wanted.  It wasnt until I arrived at home, and saw the unmistakable evidence when I undressed, that it hit me like the Proverbial ton-of-bricks.  The emotional collapse, and the hours upon hours of uncontrollable tears I shed in bed that night, are things I would wish upon only one single living being… the disgusting piece of trash that forever altered my mind, and took a part of my Soul.

I would like to close this by stating that, I did not write this account to receive mounds of sympathy comments, that is not what I want everyone to take away from this.  I DO want everyone to look at the list of mistakes I made, burn them into their minds, and do anything and everything in their power to NOT allow this to happen to them.  Play safe everyone… PLEASE play safe… so your minds and Hearts will always be filled with the fun and enjoyment this segment of life is intended to bring.


One comment

  1. […] to remain safe.  One of the worst first-encounter stories I’ve heard is Nick’s, which he courageously posted on his blog last week.  We tend to focus on safety issues for women, but as Nick learned very painfully, men are also at […]

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